My fella, the future-possible-children’s-librarian, had a job interview yesterday for a reference position in Wyoming. Unfortunately (and I can’t believe that I would ever say unfortunately about Wyoming), it looks like they only had one for-sure position. Since I am not going on at the university this fall, we have both made a crazy plan to jump ship together, at least for a year. It’s too bad; I wanted to have a bizarre adventure with cowboy poetry and rocks and sun and community outreach at a struggling library.
They would probably hire him, as he worked there last summer, but we both agree that Wyoming is a bring-your-own-booty (BYOB) state. Wyoming is so sparsely populated and demographically skewed so far away from people in their twenties, who bail out for better opportunities anywhere else, that “Bring Your Own Booty” should probably be the state motto. I told him he could go on his own, but how can you effectively show a person how to use the catalogue if you are sexually frustrated? It’s not like there are hot clones of myself running around there, like I imagine there are in, say, New York.
I feel so much freer now that I can pursue my interest in living in a small town. When I was living in Phoenix before I got knocked up, I felt this pull towards Flagstaff and spent as much time there as I could. Between being married to someone who was a jazz musician who wanted to live in a major city to pursue music, and needing to be near a university, I was pretty much stuck. Now I’m not.
So the plan for now is to find someplace cool that needs a Thing One and a Thing Two, with acceptable education options for the little Thing. I think this can be done.
Okay, maybe I’m not understanding why Wyoming wouldn’t be unfortunate. Is it the lure of small towns?
Wow. How soon?
I still have your housewarming gift
:o(
Yes, it is the lure of something that is totally the opposite of what I have now. Something new!
If only I had a big enough library to accomodate you!
wait, when did you decide not to go on in school??
Good for you! Your daughter is young, travel!
Snowy: They decided for me. I got the turndown letter a couple of weeks ago. I was really relieved and had already been looking for work out of state, so I take that as a sign.
oh! can’t ignore those signs baby :) and there’s something so fucking amazing about going for the opposite… good for you :)
and the BYOB thing, mwahahahaa :)
Oh, come to Flagstaff, by all means! We *need* Bizarro-world information specialists. Especially cute ones.
Bring Your Own Booty is brilliant! Describes the last town I was living in perfectly.
I’m SO GLAD that you’re not leaving me for FUCKITY CRAPITY CASPER, WYOMING!!!!! Dude, Wyoming is worse than just BYOB, it’s BYOS (Bring Your Own State), ’cause theirs sucks SO BAD!!!!
Man, I hate Wyoming! (State motto: “The state that shouldn’t exist!”)
move to the east coast.
ever lived here?
You’re still going to be kicking life in teef though, right? I’m addicted to your blog like a middle-aged housewife is to her soaps. No offense to those twenty-something single males who watch “their stories” too. You should come to Chicago, plenty of libraries and small suburbs to lure you, plus I wouldn’t feel like an outsider any more, I think I’m the only reader who doesn’t live in the Pacific Northwest.
No Jayson, you aren’t the only one. I’m from La Belle Province du Quebec in the equally nice country of Canada.
Yep you’ve gotta start to worry a little when you begin picking up this many Qu
Um. Not that you asked, but…
Change of city venue with new boy some very few months after chucking old husband?
Have I ever told you my theory about “the rules”?
It goes like this: there are some rules. The reason they’re rules is that they apply to things that can seem like a really good idea due to circumstances. So, for example, one rule is that you can’t jump from a great heigh. This is a rule (rather than a guideline) because every once in a while you (meaning “I”) find yourself (meaning “myself”) in a situation where you’re (meaning… well, you know) kind of altered and standing at the top of a great height and looking down and thinking, “Hey, I can fly.”
But you don’t jump. ‘Cause there’s a rule.
Again, not that you asked and obviously I don’t know any of the details.
But I’d feel remiss if I didn’t say something.
Lots of cities shold have the ‘bring your own booty’ motto. You hit it, SJ.
Flagstaff is so gorgeous…Never been to Wyoming but a place with a library and a booty you brung can’t be all bad. And who needs a sexually frustrated librarian? Such a thing could be scary, in fact.
Joshua brings a bit of sobriety to the whole thing. Excellent points, Joshua!!
Although, as I often point out to my husband (very much the rule maker) I am a rule breaker, so even though I know the rules are there to help me not make mistakes, they are RULES, man, and rules are SO made to be broken!! (“I can fly!!! ……ouch, that hurts!”)
I’ve had many beers tonight, so I want to forgive my mistakes in advance, ok? First of all, SJ, is probably the most independent, single handedly, push your face into into the sand, lift it up just to see how you like it, push it down again because she knows you hate it, and the make you swallow person I have ever had the likes to know ” by know, I mean having the pleasure to read”.
Oh, by the way, when I said Chicago I meant Indianapolis. I just moved here in November, it should’ve been time to adjust, but anyway I love Indianapolis, you should move here, visit, or stay, no big deal. Just kidding, no one should be exposed to a place were people treat you like shit if you are different. I don’t even have pink hair ( by the way I always love your choice of color) and they hate me, or dislike me, but they won’t let me marry. What up yo?
Southeastern Missouri is so the way to go, SJ. It’s lovely and small-towny, if you’re wanting that. Not a city around unless you count St. Louis two hours north, Chicago seven hours north, or Memphis three hours south. And more libraries than you can shake a stick at. I’ve only been bodily thrown out of two of them, so.
SJ, move here to MAINE. Maine: land of rednecks, lobstah, L.L. Bean, flannel, bitter cold, lighthouses, and Stephen King. My husband and I often drive by a teeny tiny library in Brownfield, Maine, on the way to see his parents in New Hampshire. This quaint little shack is only about 1,500 SF, and it has one of those hopeful thermometer signs out front to show how much money in donations they have received. The mercury has been inching up slowly, baby. It kind of breaks your heart. They could use a pink-haired girl “from away” to shake things up and raise some cash. Just a thought. Maine’s really nice. Really it is.
Everyone is chiming in. So I must as well.
Please, SJ, avoid the midwest. Think very hard about the South. Sorry, midwesterners. But you have to come from there to handle it. As far as I can tell, there is an irony deficiency. Exagerration, flamboyance, sarcasm, intense passion and the rest are not fully understood in that region–except perhaps by certain small subcultures.
The West is where it’s at if you want to be or already are naturally whacky. The East Coast-eh, OK. At least some of the people can handle sarcasm.
Look at the voting map–that’s a good key on where to live.
I think Wyoming would be cool…for awhile, maybe not for life. I think they vote Republican but it’s still beautiful there.
Lots of small subcultures where I live. Just saying.
Man if only this was a reality blog and we the audience could decide where SJ goes! Maybe we the audience could set up a poll! Does it have to be in the US? I heard they has libraries other places now but just with books and stuff. Nothing like blockbuster.
As long as they don’t switch actresses halfway through the season like they did with Missy Misdefreakinmeanour Elliott! She doesn’t look anything like the old Missy! I mean don’t they have unions for crissakes?
Hi! I’m new to reading your blog, but find you quite hilarious, and thank you much for that! Just had to add my two cents, being someone who unfortunately lived in Wyoming for 8 whole years. First of all, I never once saw a road crew that included all amazonish-type women and no men. That would be an interesting sight indeed for a state in which the men far outnumber the women. Despite the aforementioned observation, while it is a beautiful state, I can vouch for the fact that it is absolutely a bring-your-own-booty kind of place! Unless you like much older, or much more “hickish” nascar racing, rodeo-loving, tobacco-chewing educationally-challenged types of men. Don’t get me wrong there are a few really cool individuals there, but the above mentioned are the majority. That said, when I left there a little over a year ago, to move to the Caribbean, I figured the social scene would be a tad better. But, woe is me, this is a bring-your-own-booty sort of an island too, and I’m still not getting any! Anyway, I’m with the others who suggested staying in the west!
Austin and Tuscon were my favorite cities of all the places I lived (except for SF area where I am now)
Tuscon – fruit on trees! hummingbirds everywhere! weird cactus! coveys of quail! good geology too.
Austin – okay, i moved away in 1990 but it was nice. “don’t move to the south” too simple of a thought – Austin was full of freaks and in the south and midwest, the different sorts of freaks band together because you get this solidarity from being surrounded by scary hicks.
P.S. Rodeos and square dancing – both really fun.
I love you SJ, I know that you’ll find the place that fits you best. All I ask is that you keep writing us, it’s clear we’re dependent anyway. I love you all.
p.s. you wouldn’t take crack from a crackhead, right?
Weeeeellllll, I just have to jump into this conversation. I’ve been living in Maryland for almost 10 years now (well, except for that brief 3-year stint in NC, but let’s not talk about THAT….ew.) and I love it. Wouldn’t want to live anywhere else. I’m about 1 hour from DC AND Baltimore (opposite directions), but I’ve still got that “small-town” thing going on here. There is always something to do, great music scene, hot guys, GREAT schools for the little one, lots of FREE stuff to do, mountains, beaches, and for some reason lots of cows.
I’m just saying….
You guys are nutty! I had no idea this blog was going to be turned into a reality show!
Well, thanks for your two cents, everyone. I am just feeling things out, here.
And, FYI, I am from the midwest, and I have lived in the southeast and southwest. I strongly suspect I am trapped on the West Coast…I felt strange in Phoenix because I wasn’t surrounded by liberal gaylords.
News you need: VP Cheney is from Wyoming.
Do you really want to have something in common with the Halliburger?
PS – the new site looks really cool.