The Plan of a House The Body in Bed

MAN I am dead I tells you. I’m okay with starting a new job this week, really I am. I like money. What I didn’t expect is to walk for a half hour to pick up my girls every night. This is totally great, but in addition to waking up at 6 and keeping up on yoga, I am just tired. I’ll catch up.

The stressful thing is starting a new job and having summer camp end two weeks before school starts. I forgot about this bullshit. What to do now?


Goethe decides I am done with yoga.


Mère takes a bath. She was under the weather for a couple of days and I was worried about her. She slept smooshed up against my ribs last night which she never does–usually she’s between my feet. This is better than that sick cat who hides under the porch, how sad is that?


Goethe LOOOOVES her mother. Mère finds her daughter annoying. I find all of this hilarious.

I uhhhh drunkenly syndicated my blog on Kindle. I guess my point in telling you this is that it’s so easy a person who has consumed half a bottle of rosé and a small glass of whiskey can do it. Jennyalice told me to do it this weekend when I was in San Diego, and as it turns out she’s a pretty good boss. “Drink more mai tais,” she said. “Wear my underwear,” she said, handing me a spotted pair with a proper butt part since I packed drunk. I have always wondered what it’s like to pack drunk. Here is the answer: hot pink bandeau bra with silver zebra stripes, bikini top (note lack of actual for real bras) and assorted XXX-tra fancy thongs. Apparently I thought Squid‘s mom’s house was some kind of porno set.

Anyway, I hope the syndicating will be worthwhile to someone, since sometimes I write long and sometimes I write short, and I hope the average of that feels like value. I’ll have the link up when I get it. Apparently they have to look at my blog and assess its value and make sure it’s a really real thing or something. I’m still going to finish my first date series, don’t worry.

Also, this is kind of funny, ha ha, I signed a book contract for the Victorian cookbook in San Diego. Remember that? There’s more to it, and also less to it, but suffice it to say that I have a manuscript due January 5th, 2012.

17 thoughts on “The Plan of a House The Body in Bed

  1. Congratulations on the book deal! Too fab. Do you have a name for it yet? Beetontopia? Suetgasm? Never Enough Gravy? SJ in Suetopia? Whatever the title, I look forward to it.

  2. Now listen, you. I just spend two solid hours of company time luxuriating in catching up on about a month of posts and RIGHT at the end of that you just casually throw in about the book? Almost missed it. DUDE. CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So freaking chuffed for you and I cannot wait to read it!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. Thanks Shauna!!! Me too man.

    JT: The title is 23 words long. I have to look it up.

    Liz: Thanks, and I did not forget. Maybe I can do one in authentic garb.

  4. DUDE. SJ! Congratulations on the book contract! So exciting. Can’t wait to see a book on a shelf with the name of someone whose writing I’ve delighted in for … like … a third of my life. Wtg!

  5. That’s awesome about the book!

    High five!

    i know some victorian era clothing nerds / seamstresses if you want to be a Proper Lady and Homemaker for the cover.
    Laurie is easily the best.

    also, if you want crochet doilies, I make those and have a small stash of left over six inch doilies and lacy trim from before the great doily intervention of 2005.

  6. YAY! Kudos about the book deal! Keep your readers posted. Now I know what everyone is getting for Christmas 2014 or so.

  7. Hooray for book contracts! I will be snapping up that book the minute it hits the shelves.

  8. I am so excited for you and THE BOOK. But now that you’ve mastered Kindle syndication, the next step is installing the +1 button so I can press the shit out of it on this post!

  9. How dare you excite me with both book news and kindle news and then rush off?! You know my ass would love to read this on its kindle. As would my face. Hope you had fun in SD! :)

  10. Book contract! Squeeeeeeeeeeeee! And just casually slotted in at the end of the post. Talk about burying the lede. Congratulations!

  11. You are the bomb! Cannot wait to see the book manuscript. I know I enjoyed reading about the escapades on the blog. Curious about the number of color plates that will be included. I hope there will be many. Mazel tov!

  12. Word, I am pretty stoked for you about the book cookery. If I send it to you with pre paid mail envelope, would you sign it and send it back? So I can be all “Check it out, I totally know the author. She even SIGNED it.” Also, HI KELLY.

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