Well. Yesterday my sister and I were walking into QFC, a.k.a. “The Quality Food Center,” or as Mr. Husband and I like to say, “Quick Fast Crap.”

A man on his way out was walking towards us, middle-aged, bald, buck teeth–just your typical “dude aound town” that you pass all day long. What was different about this fellow is what he said to us.

“Boy!” he said, slowing down as he passed us. “You two sure need a trip to the beauty parlor!”

Now, I never said I was gorgeous, but my roots are under control right now and we were both decently dressed. The absolutely outrageous part of this was how unattractive the man himself was.

We didn’t say anything, because we are good atheists and know to turn the other cheek, but we thought of some stuff later that would have been so cherry:

Stoopid Man: “You two sure need a trip to the beauty parlor!”

Me: “Well, you need a trip to the manners parlor!”

My Sister: “You need a trip to the shut-up store!”

Mr. Husband, on being told the story later: “He needs a trip to the fist parlor!”

I think the last is my favorite.

In Other News:

Went up to the feed store in Lynnwood today (Lynnwood motto: “Where mullets lack ironic value, for they are still ubiquitous”) to get some more poultry chow.

And wouldn’t you know it, they had more orphaned chickens. Damn, I am such a sucker for orphan chickens. People dump chickens at this store when they are half-grown and are the mutty results of chook cross-breeding. Not so pleasant to look at to some, but I think all mutts very sweet; they automatically get underdog points with me. Chooks are like tattoos–can’t have just one. (Or four.)

I “adopted” two more today, and on the way home one was bocking like a normal chicken and one was trilling like a songbird, though they look very similar. You just never know.

Some people become crazy Lesbionic Cat Ladies, other collect a passel of dogs that drag them up and down the block during walks. Not me. I am starting to receive chicken-related gifts from friends, so I guess I have become The Chicken Lady. That’s cool.