Where Is the Love?

Posted on by

So, promoting the aforementioned “school party for 200” and getting a little squirrelly at this point, lemmie tell you. I made the criminal mistake of sending a “humorous” reminder that the party was approaching:

—– Original Message —–
From: sj@u.washington.edu
To: ilistserv@u.washington.edu
Sent: Friday, May 30, 2003 3:17 PM
Subject: Put on Your Party Boots, It’s the Spring Fling!

> Why: Free beer! Dancing! Drunken future librarians! Mike Eisenberg
and His Rockin’ Information Scientists!
>
> See you there!
>
> SJ
> Vice-President, ALISS
> Lord of the Dance

And then, the replies, with my responses that I can’t send in real life, unless I want my academic career to come to a screeching halt:

“From here out I would recommend that you lay off the drunken references. In case you have not noticed, a UW frat is facing a lawsuit over an alcohol related death.”

I hate this sort of thing; “alcohol-related” should be hyphenated, duh. More from the same fellow:

“I’m very surprised that this message made it past the listserv administrator. You need to remember that all of you [sic] email on this system is owned by the state, especially the listserv stuff. If something were to happen and an attoney [sic] found out about your message, it would get used in court.”

If I went to court, I’d get to wear my cool wide-brimmed hat that I never get to wear. It has feathers! More of this guy. Man, I’m tired of him, too:

“Also, you might want to consider that that while most of us do enjoy a good brew, many of us are past the age where we want the term “drunken” associated with us.”

Ugh. Lighten up, dude.

This lady was so pissed she didn’t even sign her email. Rumor has it she’s a Mormon:

“SJ – are you aware that more than half of the students in the MLIS program are over 30 and this announcement may very well keep them away from the social? Or was that your intention? Do you only want people to come who are excited by the offer of free beer?”

No, I had no idea that half the people in the program are over thirty. I mean, I look around and all I see are people with grey hair, wearing comfy jumpers and giant wooden necklaces, showing me pictures of their grandchildren…HAAAY, waitaminute….

A person in my student organization sent me this comment after I forwarded this flamey email to dozens of my peeps:

“Personally, I’m offended that she characterizes anyone over 30 as being
against drunkenness.” Hee hee.

The crab goes on, of course:

“I am somewhat surprised that someone who is as defiantly diverse as
yourself doesn’t respect the differences in those around her. For many of us this is the last time to socialize with our fellow students, however we might find the prospect of seeing “drunken future librarians” not terribly appealing.”

The Spring Fling always has free beer. Someone (me) will get drunk. The beer isn’t secret. Neither is the fact that the sticks that are in some peoples’ asses will never see the light of day.

I’ve got a question for you, Mr. and Ms. Prissy: where the fuck were you when I was planning this mofo? I mean, I only reminded people they could get involved 4800 times. “Committee meetings! Everyone welcome! Come and help plan your party!” You have made your own beds, Mr. and Ms. Prissy, and I hope you lie in them. At home. By yourselves.

7 thoughts on “Where Is the Love?”

  1. You know, as much as I feel for you, is reassuring to know that people aren’t just that bitchy and whiny at my school. I was organizing an event this year and people said pretty much the same thing – some people will be offended by what you have there, and so you shouldn’t have it. *Sigh* but you KNOW none of those objecting showed up to a planning meeting.

    Vive la resistance!

  3. My mother in-law is a librarian with the big “L” and heads all the regional public libraries here. These people are hopelessly uptight self-righteous repressed freaks, and biiiiitchy – like they invented bitchy themselves. I’d see her writing a complaint like this. The profession as a whole desperately needs fresh new human beer-swillin’ blood. ;)

  5. Don’t be afraid the old people.

    They’re not so intimidating when you catch them out back, alone, in a dark parking lot. One swift blow to the larynx and she

  6. Dear Future Librarians:

    I would like to take this opportunity to apologize for references made in my last e-mail re: “Free beer! Dancing! Drunken future librarians!” I apologize sincerely and unreservedly. Really. It was an immoderate, insensitive and poorly thought out comment and I hope that my colleagues, my friends and my family can find it in their hearts to forgive me.
    However, in my own defense I must point out that I was, for some reason, excluded in the distribution of Dean Eisenberg’s recent memos, “Information Science: Got a Pulse? Change Your Major.” and “Conversational Etiquette for Recovering Alcoholics and Calvinists”. Had these memos been properly directed to my box (no pun intended) I can only say that my attitude would have been very different.
    Also, given what I now know of the school’s demographic make-up, I recall several past incidents with a new embarrassment

Comments are closed.