My Point Is On the Top of My Head

No complaints, so that’s passing for a good mood today.

Actually, maybe I have one complaint. I am peeing endlessly today. ENDLESSLY. I think that my skin and cells are being converted to liquid. I am imagining myself running out, like hourglass sand. There will be nothing left at the end of the day…dried up, a husk.

I have actually been willing people to SHUT UP today as they have been talking to me, because I’m just thinking, “I GOTTA P, YO.” Interesting conversations, too…about…stuff. Fuck, I can’t remember, I GOTTA PEE.

I am thinking about all the peeing I have done, in places I shouldn’t have. Once, after the Windy City Weed Fest, I peed in downtown Chicago inbetween two open car doors. Right into the gutter. I have peed in one million pools and I am not sorry. It’s fun to be in the middle of the warm cloud of pee, especially if the pool is cold. I have peed outside of everyone’s house on their rhodies as I was gettin’ a drunk on. If you dare to get in the shower with me, I will motherfucking pee on you, and you will think the shower just randomly hotted up as you are closing your eyes and shampooing.

This entry is useless because I have to pee right now. Gotta P!

13 thoughts on “My Point Is On the Top of My Head

  1. My ex used to pee in the shower while I washed my hair, but he drank a LOT of coffee and I could always smell it. I think he never figured that out and just thought I had special pee detecting powers.

  2. You should be careful, you know. Frequent urination is one tof the early signs of a urinary tract or bladder infection. Start drinking tons of watered-down unsweetened cranberry juice right now!!!!

    Aside, why is it that it’s always the women that get arrested for peeing in public??? I’ve personally known two that have been arrested, and hundreds of men that have peed in public, and are free to tell the tales.

    Sometimes I really wish I had a penis….

  3. Styro: SHAME ON YOU! I am Pilled up to the gills at all times.

    I was just super DV Coked up yesterday, is all.

    :)

  4. Peeing on each other in the shower is a given in any long-term relationship.

    Nothing says love like “clandestine” urination on someone’s leg.

  5. I don’t wait for the long term. I like to pull that move as an early relationship test.

    I am a SUCKY girlfriend, MWAHAHA!

  6. Muwahahahahah! You f–king kill me. I can’t pee now because I have used up all my liquids by crying from laughing so hard. I heart you folks!

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