C’mon, Help Me Make It

This morning I awoke to the sight of Companion wearing nothing but a backpack. His new one, all shiny and crinkly. So the crinkling woke me up.

“Ohelo,” I said, “I think you forgot YOUR CLOTHES.”

“I was trying not to wake you up,” he said lamely.

“So you shoved all your clothes into your shiny new backpack,” I said.

“Yeeah, that was the thought.”

“I think you need a few more levels of Sneak,” I said.

“Sorry,” he said.

“Hey, don’t go. Let’s have sex,” I said.

“REALLY? But I don’t know what time it is.”

“If only we had some way of determining the time…if only there was some sort of machine we could use…,” I said.

“Ha, ha,” he said.

We have tried, without any success, to have a clock in the bedroom. They either get devastated by Hurricane Strudel or disappear, or don’t work in the first place. Or they tick too loud. We wake up and it could be seven or it could be ten-thirty. Why not start every morning with a little excitement?

“I need to put the trash out,” Companion said.

“And if you go out you are guaranteed to awaken Naked Feral Dwarf,” I replied.

“Yes.”

“Goodbye.”

“Goodbye,” he said.

We really have to do something about the clock thing. Also the naked man wearing a backpack thing. I almost grabbed my Glock. Yo.

13 thoughts on “C’mon, Help Me Make It

  1. “Hey, don’t go. Let’s have sex,” I said.
    “REALLY?”

    Haha – those two lines just tell the world you guys are so married.

  2. LMAO @ Halo. And also at the visuals. Tell me, was he wearing socks? Nudity with accessories is so much funnier if it includes socks. Black ones for preference. No? Okay.

  3. naked man in backpack = complete turn-on. who knew? i think it could work for me if he was also wearing black socks and sandles.

  4. So I came across your blog less than a week ago when google searching midwives/birth centers. Anywho I’ve read a fair amount and then last night you guys were in my dream. It took place in my backyard and you and Franny were on the lawn with other random people and I was talking to you about the nannying/babysitting I was going to do for Strudel. Then I heard Companion on the balcony with Strudel and he was really old (60+) and unattractive. Well the dream was random but essentially the Naked Feral Dwarf was playing in rose bushes and we couldn’t get her to stay out of the thorns and Companion was under the impression that I was some stalker that was trying to steal his child…

  5. Hilarious. Naked feral dwarf. Everything. But more than anything completely naked with only the new backpack on.

  6. I didn’t so much have a dream of you as a conjured up image of Campanion and that carpet muncher Dora the Explorer…..or is it her cousin Diego?
    “Backpack! Backpack!!”

Comments are closed.