I just found a Greek cel phone ad done by Peter Bagge. The television is pregnant and an ultrasound technician runs in to give it an ultrasound, and it is pregnant with a cel phone. I learn something new every day on the internets. It kind of makes me wish I’d given birth to a cel phone, which would have been easier than what actually happened.

Also, in between writing for (potential) dollars offline, I am working on the next PNW’ed. I can’t just leave unicorn and cat stranded, can I?

Confidential to CB: Tell me how you got the jelly jar stuck there in the first place, and then I will help you. Also, send pictures next time.

PS: While we’re on the subject of things stuck in people’s rectums, I am wondering if anyone can help me. I am looking for some old school doorknocker earrings a la:

Got any sitting around from an old ex-boyfriend or something? Gold is ideal, and any random name will do. Nicknames are a plus. The bigger the better. Let’s talk…email me at DopemoneyGstringdogg@iasshole.org. Thanks kids.

SCREEM! There’s a Kwik-E-Mart in Seattle! I know what I’m doing tomorrow! Rad.