POOR OLD MR. HUSBAND. He has no idea what I’m up to most of the time. I have two bosses named Karen and my schemes change faster than Melanie Griffith’s profile. I would be confused if I were him, too.
Mr. Husband is also a schemer; unfortunately, his schemes are less realistic than mine. I scheme to run for student office, or to get a professor to write me a recommendation. He schemes and schemes and schemes…and that’s it.
I have never seen anyone so excited to get credit card offers in the mail.
“Ooh, look! They want to offer me a $20,000 loan! Now I can open that jazz club/coffee shop/iguana ranch I always wanted!”
To be honest, the whole business makes me nervous. He is not a person known for his follow-through. He has attempted college many times and gets bored after one quarter. We are currently living in a half-finished house that he has not worked on in almost a year. I can still see exposed wires. I am not going to let this man take out a business loan.
Like most people, he doesn’t like to be reminded of his foibles. I don’t like hearing about what a bitchy loudmouth I am, and sometimes over-sensitive to boot, so I understand. Instead of saying, “Gee, honey, do you really think you’ll be able to follow through with that business plan?” I give him facts, and places to get started on research, like the library. Dreamers hate reality. I wouldn’t bring it up at all, if it weren’t for the fact that my financial future is tied to his.
So I sneak. And am realistic. And bite my tongue when he has found a way to become a “millionaire by the time he’s 40.”
My sneaking goes like this: I get the mail every day, and weed out all of his credit card and loan offers. Sometimes I fail, and he gets it first. He was reading one today while we were driving to lunch.
“Wow!” he said. “My credit must be getting better because I am finally getting credit card offers again.”
“Or,” I said gently, “They are sending them because you have bad credit.”
He thought for a minute.
“Nah, that stuff’s fallen off my record by now.”
I love him dearly, but he should not open his own business, or take on $20,000+ in debt while I’m in school. What he really needs to do is not work at all, and just practice his horn. That’s what he really wants. I think he will be a great home-daddy, as long as he can play a few gigs.
The light goes on for my newer readers: “Ah, he’s a musician.” Alas.
“Just hang on,” I keep saying. “When I finish school you can stop working and do whatever you want. Hang on!”
“Look!” says Mr. Husband. “An instrument repair course, and it only takes nine months!”
That’s about six months too long, sadly.
LOL! When I was married, my husband had that same problem.
Although he was much less inventive and artistic.
“Oh, I’m going to open a VIDEO STORE!” And compete with the Blockbuster two blocks down?
“Yeah, I think I’m going to open a FLOOR CLEANING BUSINESS!” I’m sure Kwik-E-Mart feels the need to do this enough to provide us with a gargantuan income. Have you -seen- their floors?
I feel your pain. Well, I did. When I was married.
I can’t explain why my ability to write nutritious comments has left me like this, but it has, so I’ll just say what I always say:
my brother calls me every month with a new get rich quick plan for some new idea.
i’m glad i’ve had the good sense not to invest,
but that jazz club/coffee shop/iguana ranch? im in!
I know a guy who does nothing but talk about how he’s going to [instert random stupid idea] and he’s going to be the BEST at it and he’ll be so much better than anyone and he’ll revolutionalise the field and he’s great and everyone else is crap and…
and he never does anything other than talk. It’s because he’s extremely crap, and knows it. I do wish he’d stop talking.
Um. I’m not saying that Mr Husband is crap, I was just talking. Its a thing I do.
“Dreamers hate reality.”
I am a dreamer. I remember in the ’70s my friend’s mom had this poster in her bathroom. I don’t remember the exact content but it extolled the virtue of being a ‘dreamer.’
Now that I’m in my 30s I know that being a dreamer sucks!
Still, I love your husband’s dreams. Iguana Ranch! Can I steal that one?
I’m not sure what this site is about but, we have a business called the iguana ranch, its a B&B..so Miel, please don’t steal that one! its already taken.