Warning: I am ON THE WIG. My PhDude interview is Monday. I am going out to attempt to buy a couple of nice blouses for the two-day-PhDude recruitment extravaganza. I will distract myself by doing some boring girlie-obsessing.
This will be challenging, because I am not enough of an Amazon to shop at the Giant Tall Lady store. Also, the very smallest of the Lane Bryant sizes don’t fit me anymore. I popped in there the other day to see if they had something that would accommodate my attractive giant ribcage/shoulder/rack triple threat, but I have lost so much weight that I have been rendered invisible to the sales clerks, so I took the hint and got out. I got a kick-ass pair of obsequiously-vanity-sized trousers at Express, but all their tops are for people who are in proportion with their bottom halfs. I think I will have to settle for something I can stretch over my disproportionate upper half. Sometimes I think I am built like a turkey baster, or perhaps a really fucked-up hour glass.
Monday and Tuesday will be a total freakout. They want you all day long, and will be plying us with coffee and sugar throughout. I think they want to see if you can stand up under the typical PhD diet. I will have to smuggle in some protein in my bag. I can just see myself after the faculty lecture, snarfing turkey jerky in the big stall of the ladies room, as the can is demonically flushing and re-flushing itself.
Wish me luck getting into the cult of IS. If they take me, I’ll see you real-life peeps when they let me out in 2008. However, no matter how bogged down I get, I will always schedule time for sex. Priorities, fuckers!.
In Other, Marginally More Interesting News
I am back in the field tonight, doing interviews. It is going really well and I am very excited by the results. I feel like I am supposed to be doing research. It sounds corny, and I can’t believe I’m even going to commit this to text, but: I may have found my life’s work.
I am not scratching bail bondsman off the list yet, however.
Also, strip-o-gram!
Good luck SJ. I’m sure your well endowed top half, sparkling wit, magnificent hair combined with your IS brilliance will knock ’em out, wow em, etc. But do bring protein!
Thanks, Miel.
Does your tube top match the vanity pants?
Good luck, though, seriously! Three cheers for the highest education!
Best wishes on your Monday and Tuesday. Are we gonna see pictures of SJ, v. 5.0?
GOOD LUCK SJ!!
(Will we still see you Monday night?)
think panda thoughts.
that figure one looks just like a freehand version of the uterus-canal-&-tubes drawing. i mean, except for the face.
Scott-San: Yes, I should have a picture snapped on the fateful day. I will look very sharp in my trousers, methinks.
The floating turkey baster head shot is from October. I am still a brunette, and will be until I am out of the field and done with this PhD business.
*fingers and toes crossed*
bon chance mademoiselle! may your higher education dreams come to fruition.
And yea thine new pic doth rocketh!
God: why did you take my puppy away when I was six???
man, just feel so happy for you i could shed a little tear lately, so glad this research thing is working out so well. i can’t believe this PhD process is so gruelling, best of luck comrade!
Kick some ass tomorrow for those of us who wussed out on our own PhD.reams.
I stole a catalog from the neighbor’s mail on Saturday and they actually had a photo of a woman wearing office pants, a blazer, and… a tube top. Amazing!
What they said. Only with more swearing. Rock on, Assholio!
<——— is built the same way. I like your description! ha