I have been writing so much online lately I feel obligated to catch you up on things. A lot of times when I am depressed or otherwise unmotivated I just puke into the wordbox and run away, which leads to people going “what happened with so-and-so” to which I say “paisley banana” because I am irritating like that. So, an update.

1. Okay, so the lice are beaten into submission for now. I am not so foolish as to say that they are gonesville, because we know where that kind of hubris gets us. That’s right, pregnant with triplets, a pegleg, and with a car we can’t afford to take out of hock. You know, despite the fact that lice can go and be everywhere, I thought I was living some kind of charmed lice-less existence, kind of like how I have never (yet) had strep throat.

This morning I was talking to a friend about it as well, and she was recounting her family’s experience with parasites and how loaded that all is. There are so many implications there about class and money or lack of, and everything. I will say that when I was in school there was one girl who we knew was the lice vector repeatedly and she was always kind of a hot mess and was nicknamed “Booger” because guess what she used to do in the front row of music class? I’ll never forget when Mrs. Giardini stopped playing her autoharp to snap, “JESSICA! Stop that.” I guess I made some kind of connection between lice and personal habits and possible moral turpitude, I don’t know.

I am also feeling extra empaddled by the universe since we just did a month of flea battling. Wug.

2. Job hunting rambles on. Today I stormed off a website that is taking applications for a job because I found it to be one of the most horrendous pieces of application software I have ever seen.

a. The multistep form. FUCK RIGHT OFF with that. You know the form’s going to crash on you when you’re on step seven of nine and it will eat everything.

b. Salary expectations. Hmm, let’s see here. The job description did not include a job title and was rather vague about allocation of duties and time spent. Honestly, the job requirements were even a little vague. I can work well in those vague areas because I am fast on my feet and a quick learner, but you want me to assign a value to a job that sounds, at this point, rather vague? I’d really like to get to know you better and hear what you can offer me before I under or overbid myself, thanks. And what’s that, you won’t accept the values “negotiable,” “$00.00,” or “$1.00”? Screw that.

c. I’m a job applicant, not a study participant. Please don’t make me fill out multiple steps about where I heard about your job or other stupid information like that.

Your application page is my first indication of you as a company, as opposed to your products. You sound like boobs. I had to X the fuck out of there.

3. Further, I have now been to two trainings for retail job, totaling nine-and-a-half hours of training. Next Sunday I have ANOTHER two-hour training. After the most recent training, they drop the little bomblet on us that because of the way the economy is, we may not get called to work for three weeks in a row, if at all. When I applied I was told that I would probably be working between 20-40 hours a week. They made us come to the training in uniform, which I had to buy, because I did not own pants in their company colors. Some of us may be kept on after the holiday, but don’t get your hopes up. I filled out the availability form with a heavy heart.

The feedback I am getting repeatedly, when I get it, is that whoever interviewed me “liked me a lot” but that they had someone else with x experience. I get it. I have a phone interview for a job I am really interested in on Friday, and am waiting to hear back about a second irl interview I did late last week. I’m tired.

4. Also, lucky me, I wrote the inaugural post over on Uppity Women today. I am going to be posting there Tuesdays at a minimum, with whatever current event strikes my fancy. Some posts will be more feminist than others, I reckon. I am probably going to keep it light over there until I find my voice and figure out what I’m doing. It’s been fun making the shift between here and Blogher, which is a different sort of blog with a different audience, so I look forward to exploring another facet of how I want to write there.

5. I made an Obama cake and I want to show you it, but I cannot transfer pictures onto Abacustop. I am still working on prying my harddrive out of Hester Prynne. Life feels so slow this week and I am all getting my tired on because I am ramping up my running again now that my legs feel better. I ran two miles today and did a mountain of lousy laundry. Booyacah!