I Thought It Was a God-Given Right to Beat Off in the Shower

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Memo.

Not fake.

Aw, Mr. P., you’re such a joykill.

ETA:

Hello Mr. Robinson,

As a complete stranger, I am sorry to bother you about something so odd. There is an image of a memo with your name on it circulating the Internet in the United States, and a lot of lively debate about whether it is real or not. Did you write this memo? If you did, do you recall how recently it was written? I am NOT a journalist. This is innocent curiosity.

Here is the image of the memo: http://img156.imageshack.us/img156/1494/cloggedjm9.jpg

Have a good day!

Thanks for your time,

SJ

I’ll let you know if I get a response.

32 thoughts on “I Thought It Was a God-Given Right to Beat Off in the Shower”

  4. You know, it’s hella cheaper to de-clog some drains (even over and over again) than to do DNA testing – that shit’s expensive!!

  8. I’m guessing it’s still OK for females to masturbate in the showers there? Where do I sign up?

  10. Yeah, I thought the point was that it thins down so the little swimmers can cruise. But certain persons says it thickens up on exposure to air and with time.

    Are there any men lurking around here today? Testimonials?

  11. Dude, I have clogged more drains than I care to remember! It is wiggita-wiggita-wack how bad that gunk curdles sometimes.

    Haha just kidding.

    That is the ph0n135t m3m0 EVR, though it looks like a good fake. You would have to have a whole platoon of bukkake queens soakin’ the choad before you’d get that kind of accretion. Nope, ain’t even vaguely fo-shizzle.

    1337 p0k3r!

    P.S. I am a person of the wang-having variety.

  13. Sigh.

    Okay ladies, here’s the story: jism reacts differently to warm water than it does to warm women. I can only imagine this is due to the pH difference between plain old water and the loving embrace of the bearded clam. In warm water, baby gravy congeals into a kind of chunky sticky substance that has a lot in common, consistency-wise, with rubber cement. Generally speaking it’s not a problem, because there’s not very much of it and it is (one hopes) biodegradable and will break down in the pipes even if it doesn’t actually dissolve in water– very much like hair and dead skin and every other insoluble thing that gets washed into the drain. But, if there was a shower that a lot of men used that they were also inclined to jerk off in– so they were dumping three or four shots a day, every day –I can easily imagine that it might be a problem for the plumbing.

    And… ick.

  14. As it turns out, Joshua wins at the internets again. You may sigh, but I really didn’t know, so I appreciate yer edamacation.

    I haven’t heard back from Mr. Robinson yet.

  15. I dunno, if your plumbing can’t take copious amounts of frat boy spunk I personally think you’re a shameful excuse for a post-secondary institution. I don’t recall any Roman documents on the subject of clogged spermatorium drains. So are we now saying that modern plumbing just ain’t up to the job? *Oh Yes, spermatorium is a word. The urban dictionary even offers the sample phrase “Li’L Kim is a fucking spermatorium” to prove the point.

  19. I haven’t been up to anything lately. I’ve just been letting everything wash over me recently. My life’s been generally boring lately.

  20. I haven’t been up to anything lately. I’ve just been letting everything wash over me recently. My life’s been generally boring lately.

  30. My life’s been basically boring recently. I’ve basically been doing nothing to speak of. That’s how it is. I just don’t have much to say recently. Oh well.

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