Did you hear???? They’ve just released the title for the next HP book! As loyal readers may know, I blew through the entire series this summer, and am SO EXCITED!!!! In fact, the reason I’ve been posting here a little less is because I’ve been writing Harry Potter Slash with Snape and Mrs. Norris! (If anyone’s interested, my handle is “HairyPooper47″ at Quiddich? I Hardly Know Her?. AND IT’S QUALITY SLASH, I TELLS YA.)
ANYWAYZ, I’ve got an exclusive tip on what the new U.S. cover’s going to be! WOWSERS!
[cleek]
Graumagus, of the now-defunct Frizzen Sparks, added hilarious text in my comments. Thanks, Grau!
“Strewth!”
Ron’s eyes were as big as saucers as he gazed opon the purple shaft quivering in Harry’s hands.
“Wot are you going to do with THAT, thing Harry?”Harry never took his eyes from the instrument of destruction in his hands. “I’m going to ram it up Snape’s ass, Ron. It’s the only way I can break his concentration enough to get a curse past his guard.”
“You’ll never get that past Snape’s sphincter without lubrication, Harry.”
Hermoine stepped forward and took a closer look at the Sparkle Wang.
“Harry! How did you ever get Hagrid to make a mold of his penis for you?!?”“How did you know that was a copy of HAGRID’S wedding tackle, Hermoine??” Ron asked, suspicion in his eyes….
Coincidentally, I just invented a new (to me) drink! Eggnog vs. Kahlua! I call it a Freckled Russian. Me FTW!!!! SO GROOD!!!!
Also, PS, did you remember it’s Global Orgasm Day? I almost forgot but good ol’ Badger reminded me. How did people pull this off, anyway? I mean, who ever heard of the Earth having a clitoris or whatever? [Insert joke about Star Jones, a hoagie, and a turtle wearing flipflops here.)
Monkey Chow OUT!
Nice Harry Potter cover. Just as I imagined it would be.
Global Orgasm Day? Been there done that, with no help from anyone. Glad to celebrate.
I always tell myself I’m going to get all caught up with the Harry Potter series, and then I just don’t. And then I read the the book that belongs to whatever movie is about to come out in the day or two before I’m going to see it just so I can bitch about how much better the book was.
Giant sparkle wang. I shot hot cocoa out my nose.
Holy crap, I almost hurt myself laughing so hard!
Now…I need to go get my hands on that book.
“Strewth!”
Ron’s eyes were as big as saucers as he gazed opon the purple shaft quivering in Harry’s hands.
“Wot are you going to do with THAT, thing Harry?”
Harry never took his eyes from the instrument of destruction in his hands. “I’m going to ram it up Snape’s ass, Ron. It’s the only way I can break his concentration enough to get a curse past his guard.”
“You’ll never get that past Snape’s sphincter without lubrication, Harry.”
Hermoine stepped forward and took a closer look at the Sparkle Wang.
“Harry! How did you ever get Hagrid to make a mold of his penis for you?!?”
“How did you know that was a copy of HAGRID’S wedding tackle, Hermoine??” Ron asked, suspicion in his eyes….
Bad, bad asshole.
Bad.
Bad. Bad.
Hey, that’s of the TEMPORARILY defunct Frizzen Sparks, thank you very much :)
Should be back up before the new year.
Nothing get’s my Christmas MOJO workin’ like a giant purple sparkle number! Does it vibrate? Deck my halls!! Oh, yes.
And have YOURSELF a merry GIANT Christmas!
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Miltonized:arabesque!sprouted pelting synthesized workspace.Anatolia!earphone
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