MORRISSEY DO NOT PUSH OFF

YOU GUYS, I ALMOST DIED! Okay, that is a slight exaggeration, and by “slight” I mean “not true at all.” What happon is that I started a new job that is making me 79% less homicidal. YEAH! I love it. No more veal pen. They can see my smart as if my head is transparent and they are going to use it. I feel confused being in a place where diligence and cleverness is rewarded, but I will probably adjust.

I have some advice for you: the best thing you can ever do is quit a wretched job ON YOUR BIRTHDAY. For me the timing was right, but man was it great. On being asked if I was going back to HQ to drop off my badge and such I got to reply “NOOO IT’S MY BIRTHDAY AND IMA GO GET DRUNK.” I might have shouted slightly. I am the soul of professionalism.

So I turned in my badge to a supervisor a couple of levels up, as I was asked to do, since my former boss was actually located in another city. And then DOH, I was trapped in the building since I had no way to badge out of the parking garage. The admin did not have a temp pass or anything to give me, so I had to wait for security, who I then hit on on the way down to the garage (I had to, he looked like Luke Wilson). I was GIDDY with Escape from Fail Mountain.

Then my fabulous friend took me to lunch at the elegant and classy Red Robin, where we munched 3,000 fries and grilled cheeses and fruity boozy ahoy. I came home with a bottle of wine, made a curry, and hung out. Then some things happened that would singe your eyebrows off, gentle reader, so I shall exclude them.

IN CONCLUSION. I am happier about birthdays again, volunteering for the film festival is over so I can go back to hibernating in my house. It has been POURING lately so I am having second thoughts about running right now. But I think I found a yoga studio near work that has earlybird classes so YAY and WIN. Do I sound happy? I am mostly. I am hanging onto it. There is one piece missing but I think it is behind the sofa and the cat has been sucking on it. HAVE A GOOD DAY.